Must A Aspiring Content Creator Friend Stop Exploiting People for Content?

One Side: Beth

Sometimes I'm recorded while I’m eating. It's jarring to spot myself on her social media – it’s like a jumpscare.

My best friend of a decade, Marielle, labels herself the “creativity monarch”. It’s fun for a bit, but it strains our relationship.

She is an extrovert, she feels the need to document everything constantly. During meals out, she says, “The phone eats first,” and snaps pictures with bright lighting, which induces embarrassment. It's unpleasant when other people see her performing for the camera – I experience vicarious awkwardness. It also frustrates me because meals lose their warmth.

She isn’t exactly an online personality yet, but Marielle is aspiring to become one. She creates vlogs about city life, her daily routine, and her styling career. The material is quality, credit where it's due, but I don’t want to be dragged into it. Sometimes she films me while dining, or just accompanying her. I’ll see myself on her feed afterwards, and it pops up like a surprise: I might be no makeup on, an awkward face or photographed mid-bite. It’s uncomfortable.

Marielle also anticipates that I will to film her at inconvenient times. Often I'm in conversation to someone else, or we're simply hanging out in the street. I feel like our bond has turned into me serving as her unpaid videographer. She could easily hire someone if she wanted high-quality content. Upon mentioning my discomfort about the situation, she brushed it off. I've been invited to several brand events, which was nice, but that doesn't compensate for all the time and effort I spend helping her create material.

I’m grateful that she has helped me with my career in design, but I resist our friendship to become just a ledger of exchanges. I don't believe she's insincere or inauthentic, but sometimes I feel that if recording starts, we will begin acting in a way that makes us look good for her vlog.

Her directive is, “Alright, smile for the camera!” and record me smiling with another. It feels forced. It's crucial her to recognize that our decade-long friendship still has boundaries. I love spending time with her, but I also desire to experience it without being filmed, altered, or posted for an viewers. I am not a accessory for her online persona.

The Defence: The Content Creator's View

I want my friend to see that the content we produce together can get us a foot in the door.

I am passionate about creating videos. It's more than a hobby; it's integral to who I am. Producing content and sharing my life online enables me to show my personality and engage with people in new ways.

I wouldn't label myself as a full influencer yet, but it's savvy to make money from your passions. I look up to people on social platforms who execute that style of informal, self-made content creation.

Content creation is my version of living actively: noticing the details, sharing them with an audience that appreciates the art behind it. I never intend to make Beth uncomfortable. Taking her to professional gatherings was my method of offering access, providing her a chance to witness exclusive moments that could benefit her professional path too. That’s not leverage, it’s just being realistic.

I’d still take her to these events even if she refused to assist me, but I want her to see the benefits the content we create together can achieve: a foot in the door. I know not everyone enjoys being on camera, but sometimes spontaneity is what makes content genuine. Appearing on video occasionally is part and parcel of being my companion. I'd remove anything she asked, but she has never asked yet.

I don't demand anybody to be my personal filmmaker, but companions support one another in small ways. My assumption was recording a clip now and then would be fun for Beth. Creativity flourishes in collaboration, and having Beth around makes projects energetic and enjoyable. I never force her to participate in anything, and I’d never deliberately embarrass her. But creating content jointly occasionally is part of how I record our time together.

I cherish our friendship profoundly and want to avoid making videos to come between us. I’m willing to compromise: like asking before recording, and avoiding angles that might make her self-conscious.

This is not about power, it's regarding expressing my perspective while still respecting hers. Clearly making content is not a substitute for genuine friendship: it's merely part of how I experience life and I desire her to be involved in a way that’s agreeable for both of us.

The Jury: Public Sentiment

Is it right for her to stop filming herself and Beth when they are out together?

There’s nothing more uncomfortable than having a companion film you. I get that it's her passion, but I don’t make friends come to my workplace. Maybe she can find like-minded creators to create content with. With the uncertain future of technology, personal relationships are the only thing we have – cherish them!
Liberty, 25

If you’re doing something as a career, you can’t ask your friends for help repeatedly, even if they have done it before. If Marielle loves creating, that doesn’t mean everyone around her is willing material. She must to honor her friend's personal space.
Ankit, 26

She may enjoy making content and displaying her life publicly, but it isn't for everybody. It’s nice she has assisted Beth’s career, but she must to listen to what Beth wants.
Emma, 27

It sounds like you care about each other, so cling to that and make sure it’s the focus in your friendship. Foster some authentic experiences, where genuine feelings are stored, not online archives. Even public figures who seem to reveal their worlds actually have more privacy than it appears.
Sarah, 53

Marielle appears to be neither present nor authentic when they're together – she's on the job. Each appears confused as to what’s reasonable. The solution is not found in trying to alter one another, but in each setting clear boundaries around what feels acceptable to them and determining if there is an acceptable compromise.
Barbara, 71

Your Turn to Be the Judge

In an online poll: is Marielle over-exposing their friendship?